the-spot.net

i never had problems talking to girls, at all. BUT...i just started talking(serioulsy, by that i mean, talking to her about her and myself) to this one girl recently..and for some reason i feel uneasy around her, whereas in my past, i never had any uneasy feelings or such...its so strange, but i dont think she is noticing my...uneasiness...NEO, i just need some kinda help...i really like her, and i dont know how to seal this thing...i just really want it to work...and im not sure that i can even think straight anymore...i zoned out mowing today and almost ran into the fence...yeah...

Well, having just come into a new relationship myself, I have a new outlook on them.

Personally, I believe that if you feel uneasy with the person, then it's PROBABLY (not always) not going to last...but that's somewhat beside the point. The reason I say that is this: you should always feel comfortable with the person you're wanting to be together with. Sure it's anxious in the beginning, but by the time you're ready to make it into a relationship instead of friends, both of you should be comfortable with each other and the transition shouldn't be awkward, but smooth and expected.

But since you're still in high school, all this stuff probably won't apply to you until later. So to get rid of the uneasyness of the situation, just remember one thing...

She's a human being.

Girls have the same anxiety over asking guys out, or being asked out by them. Everything that you go through when dealing with asking the girl out...she goes through when asking a guy out. She's not a god, and you're not beneath her.

So ask her casually, and during normal conversation...ask her to something simple, like lunch...if that works, ask her to something a bit more personal...like dinner. Just make it progressive, and keep in mind that she's just a person.


[this also works with actors, bosses at work, and anyone else you think you can't talk to. They're just people...just like you.] Fear not.

thanks lots NEO..ill just do it causually...
that really helped me out with things...thanks man

Hmmm...now that NEO has answered, maybe I can offer you a very important piece of advice...she had better not be Jolyn, this girl you speak of, lest you wish to feel the wrath of a thousand Great Wyrm (wyrms as in Dragons) pouring the fiery liquids of their lungs out onto you and all that you know
Then again, if it is not...heheheh, then all is well, because she's only human, like NEO said...what have you to fear of a mere human? You like this girl, and I must ask you if you have let her know this....does this girl know? You mentioned something about your past? You have known this girl for long? Perhaps you should tell her, lest there are other complications I do not know that might make that impossible...

hah Baka...no fear my friend...I dont need to fear the Great Wyrms...
okay, but what i said about my past was that with girls before this time, i never really had any diffuculty saying how i felt...i havnt felt the sting of rejection often...i just have luck in that aspect i guess, but it seems diffrent this time
yeah
and its weird

well nathan, i don't think you should have any problems... now that i'm more informed